Baby daddy meets Poppy

I was a couple seconds late - but this video almost captures the moment Kolby and Johnny felt Poppy move for the first time - and it was the best!

These two drove all the way from Philly and arrived in Seattle last night. We had a glass - okay maybe a bottle (or two) of wine,  ate a delicious dinner (that Erin made) and talked and talked and talked. We talked about our family dynamic and we expressed our individual gratitude for collectively planning and preparing for Poppy. I cried as I thanked him - Kolby has helped Erin and I do something that we couldn't do on our own and he's done it without expectations. He has been so kind and gracious and selfless. Even more, he wants to join us in loving her and being a part of her village. We are grateful that our daughter will know her dad - and we are grateful that he is such a kind, loving and compassionate man.

We purchased Poppy's dresser/changing table and when it arrived we had to put it together. Here's to hoping putting that damn furniture together is the hardest part of parenthood. Good god, if a couple can build ikea like furniture I am convinced they can get through almost anything. It is so frustrating! Kolby learned that we hate putting it together and told us that next time we get anything that requires assembly that we should wait until his next trip out and have him do it. Done.

We had our first baby shower on Sunday. Goodness gracious, Poppy scored. She is a spoiled baby already. We have another shower this Sunday. Sure, it's fun to get baby stuff because we need it and all of it is so dang little and cute but more than anything we feel the love and support from our family and friends. Blessed doesn't begin to express how have felt through our entire pregnancy.

Erin continues to be a champion. She is still working 8 hours a day on her feet without complaint. She is becoming more uncomfortable and is having a harder time sleeping but neither of those things are slowing her down. She's a hero, no doubt.

Our labor classes have been interesting. We practice coping techniques, watch different types of labors, learn about medications and different positions to manage pain. I cry most of the time. We joke that Erin will be comforting me rather than me comforting her during the process. I cry because all of it is so amazing to me. I want to high-five every woman that has ever given birth. It's incredible to me what they go through. I am nervous about seeing Erin in pain - she is confident she wants to this without an epidural. Her strength and what she is willing to go through for our baby is quite remarkable. Erin is remarkable.

Only 6.5 more weeks until we get to meet her. Wow. Shit is getting REAL.

9 Weeks To Go!

My valentine is at work (while growing a baby for us) and I'm on the couch in my sweats relaxing thinking about her. And I'm awed.

Erin is a hairstylist - so she is on her feet all day. She often times works 10 hours in a day without a break - sometimes without much time to use the bathroom (which is a pain for pregnant women) - and then comes home and wants to cooks for me, hang out with me, is so loving and kind and then wakes up and does it all again. And I should mention that most days she participants in a cross fit workout before going to work. I don't know how she does it. And I don't know why she continues to choose me - but I'm so glad she does!

Hawaii was great. We relaxed. We laid by the pool. We got in the ocean. We went whale watching. I got super sunburnt (15spf DOES NOT WORK). Erin rocked her baby bump in her bikini and I freaked out because she was the cutest! We shared our hopes and worries about becoming parents. I made a playlist for Poppy. We ate a lot of seafood. We bought Poppy a romper and I about died because it was the cutest thing I'd ever seen. We ran into friends and we ate good food.




And after all of that we still had alone time which felt important to me. My thoughts have been going a mile a minute for the last while and having time to sort through those thoughts was good. Thoughts about all the relationships in my life and how they impact me and how I want to show up in them. I know that being a parent is going to change a lot of them naturally. I thought about how I am currently using my time and how time management seems like it will be more important after Poppy gets here than ever before. I want to have time to pursue my own dreams, to shower Erin with love, to maintain and strengthen other relationships all while being a good mom.  I don't buy into the rhetoric that mine and Erin's lives will be put on hold after we become parents. I know my life will change AND that I will still do big things. I will teach Poppy to be as ambitious as she wants to be and to work to accomplish her dreams not by my words alone but by my example too. But who knows - she might get here and all of these thoughts I'm having could go out the window. blah blah blah blah blah haha. I have no idea what I'm talking about. I mean, these days I see her rolling around when I look at Erin's belly and I'm completely smitten and feel like I could just stare all day. What in the world?!

Thank goodness I still have some time to think about all of this stuff. We are 31 weeks along. 9 to go. But 37 weeks is considered full term so she could be here in 6 weeks. I kinda hope she is. I want to meet her already.

Last Hurrah

Well, I think this is the last Chelsea and Erin hurrah.  We are on an airplane headed to Hawaii to have the last real vacation as a family of 2.  We have plans for a weekend getaway over my birthday but this is different. And it feels a little bitter sweet.

I won’t get all gushy over Erin. Actually, never mind, I will.  Basically, just to put it out there - Erin is the best thing in my life, hands down. She is kind and compassionate, she is patient, she is always up for an adventure and she’s the best listener. She’s incredibly humble and such a hard worker, she is always pushing herself to learn more and be better.  And goodness gracious, she is beautiful! Erin has taught me that life can be simple even when it feels complicated. And I'll tell you what, I like to make things complicated - it's what I was used to growing up so learning that life can be simple was HUGE for me! Erin has helped me learn to trust myself and trust that things will end up okay – even if they end up different than I originally hoped and thought they would. She hears all my crazy thoughts and ideas and my needs and my wants and she’s affirming to (most of) them. She makes me feel smart and capable -like I can accomplish anything – and seriously, I feel like I can because of her. It’s amazing what happens when you have a person that has complete faith in you!

Erin and I don’t see each other that much because of our separate schedules but when we do we essentially do whatever we want. We go to Hawaii (with some extra planning of course), take a nap or go for a hike, pull out the bikes or walk to the beach, go to the bar or out for a nice meal, or do our separate things. We currently have the freedom to do whatever we want and love each other in a fun, spontaneous kind of way. So – yeah, it feels bitter sweet that our time together is changing.

We are going to soak up every ounce of love and sun for the next 8 days!  I don’t know if I am more excited for the beach or to see Erin’s baby bump in a bathing suit – I might die. We will reminisce about the last 5 years of loving each other, the last 18 months of being married, the last 30 weeks of being pregnant and then try to brainstorm ideas about how we’re going to raise a baby while continuing to be individual people that push ourselves and each other while continuing to support and build our marriage and love each other in the ways that makes the other feel special and loved. What the hell have we gotten ourselves into?

Wait. I just looked at Erin rubbing her belly. I remember now.

I can’t wait to meet our Poppy! 10 more weeks! AHHHH!